Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
i wish my penis had a tongue
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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