4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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