Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
