I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize