Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(514): View more from Quebec

His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.

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(631): View more from New York

I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me

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(567): View more from Ohio

i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand

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(601): View more from Mississippi

I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom

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(252): View more from North Carolina

A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.

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(917): View more from New York City

hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.

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(703): View more from Virginia

He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?

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(802): View more from Vermont

Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.

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