so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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