white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize