I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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