Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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