Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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