No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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