You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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