I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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