I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize
