Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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