I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
