I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
