I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
