Whod you bang
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
