But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize
