therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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