Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
