oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
