I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
