no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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