it was like his penis was on wheels.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
