Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Randomize
