it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
OPIZZABONMYDICK
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Randomize
