oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
