i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
