it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Randomize
