so explain again why im purple
no
Where is the hickey?
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
