I think i peed on brittanys purse
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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