I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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