I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
