You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
