im six kinds of drunk right now
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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