Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Randomize
