dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
