I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
