Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
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