i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
