watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Randomize
