I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
