I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
