Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
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