Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
