It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Randomize
