So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Randomize
