rhymes with "ouble enetration"
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
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