I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize