Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
