You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
how drunk are you?
Several
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
