Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
