When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
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