I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
the day after is always just damage control
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Randomize
